BREAKING NEWS: Jewish Shohei Named MVP GM

WADING RIVER – Late Saturday evening, the MVP Brew Crew and Jon “Jewish Shohei” Rich struck a deal, appointing him as MVP’s leading man for the 2026 season and beyond.

He officially becomes the 1st Jew to lead MVP. Mezel!

In his DSSL debut season in 2017, Jon earned Rookie of the Year honors and broke the non-legacy barrier with MVP. While his peers had played previously, it was rarely by choice up until that point. 

However, it was clear that Jon’s presence encouraged a new wave of youth that, over the course of multiple seasons, transformed MVP from an aging club to a championship threat. It would be these efforts that got Jon shortlisted to replace Loesch in 2021, but was ultimately deemed too kind.

Now?

Jon is an ace in the DSSL and, in one of the league’s great phenomena, becoming a pitcher immediately hardens you.

Since assuming the pitching load with MVP, he collected three consecutive Cy Young Awards, displaying his finest in 2023; Rich posted a 4-0 record en route to his first CY Young, finishing 2nd in hitting (.733), and 3rd in MVP voting.

Since 2018, MVP’s new leader ranks:

• 2nd in hits (145),
• 2nd in innings pitched (less than Loesch, more than Keith),
• and 2nd in appearances (58);

all are indicators of how versatile and reliable the “Jewish Shohei” has been during MVP’s Dodger-like run.

When approached about the GM role, Jon, in between chugs of a Tito’s handle, emphatically accepted on the spot. He has been waiting for years to get this opportunity, making him an exciting GM as a challenging depth period looms. MVP experienced a record-low 10.6 players/game in 2025, and lost multiple players who appeared in more than half of those games.

Jon, however, is one of MVP’s savviest recruiters, and the 2026 offseason calls for him to be at his best on (and off) the field, as he has been since his arrival, to lead MVP’s defense of the DSSL title. 

Buckle up, DSSL —

More on Jewish Shohei:

• Favorite beer is cold
• Served as a gambling pundit on “MVP Sportsbook” (2022-2024)
• MVP’s all-time leader in official Cy Young Awards (3)
• 21-3 (.875) as SP
• Recorded a personal-record 33 hits in 2025