MVP is Really Good (Today)

A tale of two Sundays. Last week, this blogger ridiculed a flaccid offense desperate for any spark and this week, what’s not to love? If you’re a lazy shit and don’t care to read the brilliance to follow, here’s what you missed:

• FIVE cycles recorded, DSSL record (GM, Cirincione, RJ, Slinky, ZDubs)
• Cirincione upset he missed Jersey Day memo
• Mrs. Merrill offers her sweater to Ryan James because he was cold
• Keith Sperling returns and records save
• Everett’s middle name is Peter and drops ball at first base

I’m not going to sit here and tell you last week’s blog woke up some players, but nobody strolled in at 9:28 this morning. Except Ryan Mullahey, who didn’t show up at all. Fines to come.

Ahead of Sunday’s matchup, MVP was hearing analysts from across the nation claim this team and its GM seem “complacent” this season. I can assure you, that is the furthest thing from the truth. Whether it was a mamba mentality or narcissism in its purest form, MVP’s roster was at each other’s throats trying to out-play the next guy against the Stoners on what was a rather chilly June morning.

Let’s get in to the action because there was a lot of it, but I’m not going over everything. Hit the flash-forward button and 11 runs later, a sharp ground ball is hit to shortstop. A determined Pat Biemer busting it out of the box, smelling not only a hit, but the taste of a batting title. To our surprise, and possibly his, the shortstop makes a clean snag and tosses it over to first.

OUT!

A three-letter word Pat did not want to hear. His response? A four-letter word sent in the umpire’s general direction. The umpire? The GM. Was it sabotage to secure better standing in the batting title race? No. Was that accusation tossed around? Yes.

For the record, the GM’s arch-nemesis won the batting title last year. Sure it was a bitch way to win, but rules were in place. This was merely a gentlemen-like move after an 11-run FIRST inning, might I add. We got shit to do.

MVP would add another 10 over the next couple innings, leading 21-1 after 3 and 23-2 after 6.

Upset he couldn’t hit in the 6th inning, the MVP ace, threw a temper tantrum and left the field without any regard for the team. Thankfully, assistance came in the form of another MVP vet, Keith Sperling. Keith made his 2023 debut and pitched the 6th through the final and recorded the save. He is today’s MVP of the day.

The biggest takeaway from today’s game was the return of the home run ball for MVP. They hit 8 home runs and it would’ve been 9 had John Cirincione not completely sabotaged Ryan James’ opportunity to round the bases by refusing to get off of third base until the last possible minute, forcing Ryan to hold at third. The MVP bench erupted in support for Cirincione’s antics, especially being at RJ’s expense. However, let’s see how the power swings translate next week as an MVP fly-out contest could be in the cards.

In short, MVP scores a lot. Stoners scored as much as MVP last week. Successful Jersey Day.

MVP 34 – Stoners 7

Next week, MVP is slated to take on the Goblins who, to the best of our knowledge, are undefeated, and a bit confident. Rightfully so. Typically playing the role of DSSL’s Goliath, MVP finds themselves the underdog ahead of week 4’s matchup.

See below for the GM’s post-game interview.