Due to the imminent departures of 2 members of the MVP family that fans have come to adore, the GM has decided to put those familiar faces in unfamiliar places in MVP’s upcoming Bagas match-up.
Like I said, the regular season is for fun.
The regular 1-2 combination of the GM & Rizz will instead be featuring the Cutinellas.
As you can see below, this has been highly requested/whined over:
(NOT PICTURED: Kevin’s Instagram Story Directed at the GM Saying That He’ll Lead-Off One Day)
Guess what?
The squeaky wheel got the oil; Kevin will be MVP’s lead-off hitter Sunday. He is the 1st MVP player since Chuck Azzara to get the nod since the end of the 2017 season.
Kevin was surprised earlier this week with the good news. MVP apologizes for the vulgarity, but can you blame the guy?
In addition to Kevin leading off, Frank will return to his rightful place in the 2-hole prior to his send-off down to Georgia. Sunday will also be Kevin’s final game as he too is taking his talents down south to Dallas.
Frank was a tougher sell than Kevin as you can imagine. See below:
After all was said and done, the GM closed the deal as he usually does and Kevin loved every minute of it. Again, we apologize for the language.
Kevin and Frank will also start the game in their respective primary positions: Right Field & Shortstop.
Both have been instrumental members of MVP’s continued success in the DSSL and as beloved clubhouse personalities. The signing of Kevin resulted in a surge of female supporters between the ages of 35-54 attending games. MVP’s PR team anticipates James’ Magnum P.I. ‘stache will keep the cougars at bay for now. (DEVELOPING…)
Frank, on the other hand, is the 2010 Batting Champ and a member of both the 2012 and 2019 championships. He is also credited for babysitting Loesch via early morning tennis and provided an incredibly generous donation so we can be the best-dressed team in the league. So everyone best be thanking Mr. C Sunday or you will be watching the playoff games alongside Tommy Bett (not a bad seat to be fair) who, donated the remainder of the uniform fee, so that’s 2 “thank you’s” people.
Both Cutinella numbers will be retired sometime next year whenever they make a return trip back to the Island.
A big thank you to both for their role as MVP cornerstones and the lads will proudly continue to represent the Cutinella name on our chest every pitch in loving memory of Tommy.
In other news, PwC called the MVP Front Office early Wednesday morning to inform the GM that Ryan James Bobblehead Day Presented by PwC will instead be changed to Kevin Cutinella Day also Presented by PwC. Fans should arrive a smidge earlier than usual to witness a pregame ceremony for the Cutinellas.
Don’t worry though, the RJ bobbleheads are not going to waste. They will be used as makeup/clothing models for a local BOCES program instead. That means somewhere on Long Island there is a bobblehead of Ryan James as a crossdresser.
Which probably looks a little something like this:
To wrap this up…
On behalf of MVP, we want to wish the entire Cutinella family the best of luck on their future endeavors down South and there will always be a spot for them on this GM’s roster.
Until then,
Cheers.
MVP Brew Crew Softball Club 
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